Day Forty-One: The Importance of Creativity

At noon today, I started making batter for red velvet cupcakes from scratch. I meticulously watched the butter come to perfect beating temperature, carefully measured out all my ingredients, and added a generous amount of food coloring. By two P.M., I had three pans of perfectly round and squat, red cupcakes, and I spent about fifteen minutes making smooth vanilla frosting. By 4:30 P.M., I had three pans of horrendously iced cupcakes and a severe need for a nap. After dinner and a quick nap, by ten P.M. I had twelve too-cute to eat, colorful, fondant-colored cupcakes. I took several pictures of them like they were my children, and I'm incredibly proud of them since it's the first time I worked with fondant, and they turned out pretty damn well.

So I spent ten hours of my day creating things, which I haven't done in a very, very long time. I'm not sure I've actually ever spent that much consecutive time in a day being that meticulous and creative about something, and it was good to get back into the groove of using my creative impulses again and sitting and getting that satisfying stiff neck and stained fingers, even if they were stained with food dye and not paint or graphite. It's not permanent art, but it's art just the same. After having such a satisfying day, being completely consumed by something and not want to do anything else, I wonder how some people can simply not enjoy being the slightest bit creative.

As part of my senior thesis, a quarter of our grade was a "creative project", in which we had to use what we had learned to create something tangible that we could use to either put on a resume or show potential employers. Most video majors created documenteries, but there was no set medium for specific concentrations. Two of my close friends and I threw a small benefit concert, which was a lot of work, a lot of fun, and a really interesting way to go out with a bang our senior year. But some people, unbelievable to me, had an extremely difficult time and absolutely hated the idea of the creative project at all. I cannot, even slightly understand not being creative. It is so ingrained in me that I even though I don't use concentrated creativity very often, I still can't imagine not feeling creative about something. Even if it's in the way I arrange things or the way I dress myself, I'm still being creative. And some people just don't care. How is it that some people just don't have a single creative bone in their bodies? How do they function?

Day Twenty-Six: Mmmm. Sugar.

There are very few things in life that I enjoy more than real, white, shiny refined sugar. I love cake, brownies, pie, candy, and most of all, the perfection and magic that is...the cookie. As weird and juvenile as it may sound, cookies are my absolute favorite food. I will never, ever, EVER turn down a cookie that is offered to me...unless I'm feeling guilty about my health. Which even at twenty-four, is something that I need to be conscious of with the way that I eat.

While I try to eat healthy lunches everyday, and healthy, lighter dinners when I cook for myself (my mom's cooking is too damn good for me to care that it might not be as light as I would make for myself), I make up for it by eating refined sugar in between and after meals. The only exercise I get is running up and down the stairs all and between rooms all day at work (which actually isn't bad. It's considered "light" exercise. I look this shit up.). So it comes as so surprise to me that every once in awhile I feel more than a little guilty and need to back off the refined sugar a bit. And it's pretty damn difficult.

My addiction to refined sugar puts me in a pretty bad mood when I put up a fight against it. For awhile, I tried to limit myself to one serving of refined sugar a day (as opposed to natural sugar in fruit, for example). A cookie after dinner, or a piece of Godiva that I've been hoarding since Christmas. That worked for awhile, but I would find myself looking forward to that one cookie a day, craving it, and finding that once I ate it it was gone entirely too quickly. I would pass up pastries and chocolate chip cookies that weren't deemed worthy enough to become my single treat. Then, I gave up. While I'm currently still highly limiting my refined sugar intake, I don't count the sugar on my Multi-Grain Cheerios, or the couple Tootsie Rolls I'll eat after lunch. And aside from caring about my health, there's a reason for it.

My mom recently told me about a book (forgive me, I don't know the title or author) about a cancer researcher who, while researching causes and facilitators of cancer, got cancer himself. He used himself as a model, and determined what in this diet and lifestyle were causing cancer cells to grow. In doing so, he made a very interesting and startling discovery -- refined sugar actually feeds already existing cancer cells. It helps them grow, and actually makes it more difficult for the immune system to fight them off. I was in shock. So while I'm pretty certain (knock on wood) that I don't have existing cancer cells in my body, it could one day become possible, or researchers may eventually find that sugar can cause cancer...or something. But it's already bad enough, so what's one more, slightly scary reason to limit my sugar intake?

This frightening little fact put me in a position I had never been in before. I began to understand what it must be like to be a smoker, in a way. Smokers know that they're doing something terrible for themselves, but they enjoy it, so they continue to smoke. How is this different from eating sugar? Sure, it's probably a lot less bad for a body than smoking, but eating enough of it can cause diabetes, fat, extreme weight gain, and now feed cancer cells. I'm sure if somebody were to heat up pieces of pie in a plastic container in the microwave enough times in their life, it's bound to be bordering on similar carcinogenic risk as, say, a light smoker. I really enjoy sugar, just as many smokers really enjoy smoking. Even if sugar was known to possibly cause cancer, not just feed it, I'm not sure I would eat less of it. Sure, I want to be healthy and live a long life, but I don't want to cut sugar out of my diet for the rest of my life, either. So I guess for now I'll just limit my sugar intake to the really good things, like homemade brownies and cheesecake. And if I get cancer, then I'll worry about not eating sugar.