Day Fifteen: Today, We Salute the Crazy Jackass.

There is quite an impressive number of groups of people that we honor and revere as being some of the best of our culture. There's time set aside to honor the history and achievements of other races, of women, of mothers, fathers, and grandparents, of scientists, leaders, and of artists and authors. Some people even did so much for us in the span of history that they have specific days dedicated only to themselves. But I think the time has come that we stop overlooking one of the most important groups of people that is almost completely overlooked, those who shape us and define who it is we want to be. We can learn a great deal from their fascinating brains as we would from, say, Mother Theresa. Of course, I'm talking about the crazy jackass.

Before a small angry mob of people comes to stare me down and put gum in my hair as punishment for my stupidity, allow me to assure everyone that I have a perfectly logical explanation for why perhaps our least favorite group of people deserves to be recognized. Think about the crazy jackass for a moment. Everyone knows at least one person who in one regard of their life throws all logic and sanity to the wind and lives in a way people really, really shouldn't. Think about the people who kick in windshields, and those who light trash cans on fire in malicious rage. The people who make horrible, rash decisions, like marrying someone on a whim because it seems like a grand an exciting adventure. Think about the people who devote their entire lives and incomes to collecting Batman merchandise. Aside from providing us with possible entertainment, as long as we're not the focus of their rage and or foolishly dangerous actions, these people make us stop and think for a moment. "Wow," we say to ourselves, "what a crazy asshole." And then it hits us -- we are not as crazy as they. And for a brief moment, no matter how unstable or insecure we feel, we feel absolutely normal. Nay, they allow us to feel like we are at the peak of normality. Isn't that worth something?

Okay, I admit, this is pretty selfish. But I speak not of people who have legitimate psychological problems or mental disabilities. I'm talking about individuals, who despite their unbelievable quirky habits to, say, build giant statues of beer cans in their front yard because it seems like a good idea ("We're recycling AND enhancing our property value!"), are perfectly, 90% normal. They hold down jobs, they likely haven't been arrested, and they have friends. Most of them are perfectly aware that they're crazy jackasses. And if they just happen to boost our self-esteem in the process of living their normal lives on nothing but canned ham and coffee everyday, simply because they like it, what's the harm?

Thus, I unofficially dub this week "Crazy Jackass Appreciation Week." Do you paint on canvas with your bare ass and sell it because you enjoy it? Do you buy outdoor decorations made from cow crap out of catalogues? Do you have a pet iguana you let sleep in your bed? Congratulations, my friends, you are honored this week. And thank you for making me realize that although I might get a little irrational sometimes, I am perfectly sane. You do us a great service.