I woke up this morning at 2 A.M. unable to breathe through a snotty, stuffy film that sealed thousands of germs inside my head. As I laid there staring at the inside of my eyelids and concentrating on my labored nose-wheezing, I tried not to think about getting up for work in four hours. So when my Ipod tinkled happily that 6:15 had arrived, I angrily pulled myself out of bed and contemplated the possibilities: go in, try to get through the day, and leave if I had to. After all, I had to go in early all this week to prepare for guests that arrived before office hours. So I popped a thermometer in my mouth for the hell of it (95.5...so my thermometer is broken. That's definitely bordering hypothermia.), pulled myself through the shower, ate a tasteless bowl of cereal, scraped off my car, and drove drowsily to work. After setting my car's internal temperature to a cozy ninety degrees, I felt just warm enough.
After I arrived at work and completed my early-morning activities, it was just about 8:30 when people began to arrive. When my co-worker saw me, she told me to go home. I didn't put up much of a fight. I called my boss, collected my purse and my box of tissues, and drove home. I pulled on my pink pajama pants and a hoodie and buried myself in bed until 11:30. Now, after being fed and medicated, I'm somewhat energetic, and bored. It's now that I'm pondering the fact that I am either slightly ADD, or becoming a workaholic. And I'm kind of a bad patient.
When I'm sick, I'll be happy to fill my person with as much medication as I can to make myself feel better without endangering my health further. I try with earnest to drink water all day, but I usually forget or can't be bothered about three glasses in and six trips to the bathroom. But worst of all, I get bored, and I get bored quickly. If I lay on the couch in front of the TV, or sleep on and off throughout the day, I feel worse. But the more I lay around, the faster I get better. But I can't sit still without feeling guilty, or like I'm wasting time, unless I'm really upset, or sometimes if I'm with someone else. And honestly, I act similarly on weekends. I hate laying around, and I hate sitting still for too long. So either this is a good thing that I like to seize the day, or it's terrible that I don't know how to shut myself off. My brain goes from the moment I wake up in the morning and doesn't turn off until I'm asleep. I'm always thinking about five different things at once, and I frequently start walking somewhere, think about something else, and either forget why I'm there, or start walking in the complete wrong direction. I clearly need to center myself and do yoga, or something. There's got to be something somewhat wrong with this.
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